How can life be wildly loud and lonely, at the same time?

How can there be so much movement, but no action?

How can one be lost, but surrounded by a crowd?

How do you survive the chaos when it feels like it is eating you alive?

… I do not have the answers. But this is my reality.

Seasons like this remind me of a wild ride at the fair. The type of ride that spins you around and upside down – at the same time. The type of ride that looks fun, until you are stuck in the air, mid-ride – waiting for it to be over. Barely even enduring it. There is so much overstimulation of the senses. This is NOT my favorite.

I know that there is a God who sees. I have faith that plan B has a redemptive ending. I choose to hold on one more day, waiting with my eyes shut tight for His tangible hand to be extended in grace.

I choose the chaos… this is my life.